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How to Be a Partner In Your Child's Education
by David Drayfirth
http://www.fseducation.com
One of the ideas that has risen to renewed popularity in the
last few decades is the concept of parents and teachers
being partners in the education of children. It's an idea
with a great deal of merit. After all, you share a common
interest - the best possible education for your child.
Being a partner in your child's education means more than
helping with homework, or volunteering to chaperone school
field trips, though those can be a part of the equation. It
includes being aware of what your child is being taught in
school and by what methods. It requires that you support the
authority of the teacher in the classroom, without losing
sight of the needs of your child. It will often mean
stepping back, taking a deep breath, and letting your child
handle it himself - whether 'it' is a particularly tough
class project, or difficulty getting along with another
student.
As a family advocate working in a neighborhood center, I
often heard parents complain that teachers didn't treat
their children fairly, or didn't understand what their child
needed. At the same time, I heard repeatedly from teachers
that parents were non-responsive to invitations to parent
conferences, or didn't even care enough to make sure that
homework was finished.
All too often, parents and teachers lined up in camps on
opposite sides with regards to the children when both sets
of interested parties had the same goal - to help each child
achieve as much as possible in school. Instead of working
together, both parents and teachers tried to work in spite
of each other.
The unfortunate truth is that far too often, parents and
teachers develop an adversarial relationship in regards to
the education of their children. Parents feel teachers are
treating their children poorly. Teachers feel parents are
uncooperative with educational goals. Children, caught in
the middle, often exacerbate and foster the adversarial
roles, telling parents how the teacher 'picks on' them, and
the teacher that her parents 'wouldn't let me' do homework.
As a parent, it is up to you to take the first step toward
forming a partnership with your child's teacher. It is your
job to be your child's advocate with the school system to
get them the things they to foster their education and
learning. Especially if your child has special needs, his
teacher can be your most effective ally in forcing the
school department to provide accomodations that your child
may need to get the most out of his education.
1. The key word is communication. Call the school and make
an appointment to meet with your child's teacher to discuss
his or her progress. Set aside any hostility before the
meeting. Remember, the goal is to figure out how you can
work WITH the teacher.
1. Become informed. Know what the school is obliged to offer
your child in the way of accomodations. Understand the
school department policies on curriculum, including what
should be taught at your child's grade level, how much
homework should be assigned, and what kind of special
assistance is offered in your school district.
2. Open the lines of communication between home and school
Contact your child's teacher to set up a meeting to discuss
any concerns that you have about his or her education. Don't
wait to be asked, or you risk not knowing that there is a
problem until it is already a major issue. Let the teacher
know from the start that you are open and receptive to new
ideas that will help your child.
4. Once you've opened the lines of communication, keep them
open. If the teacher is open to it, set up a means of
regular communication, or establish guidelines about when
the teacher will contact you - if your child fails a test?
if he hasn't turned in his homework x number of times? The
biggest mistake most parents make is ONLY having contact
with their child's teacher when problems have reached
critical mass, or through standard progress reports. The
single most important thing you can do to enhance your
child's education is staying in the loop. Be a partner in
his or her education by establishing a good relationship
with his teacher, and you'll see a remarkable improvement.
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